Contemplating Bringing in a New Year...

Just a quick note on bringing in the new year. I hope you all are gonna be having much more fun than I am tonight. *looks pointedly at Rali and Wudge* At least you'll have someone to entertain yourselves with. Even Avi, i'm sure, will have more fun then I will. Heck, even my England bound Daphne will probably get more of a kick out of the pass of one year to the new then I will. I'll be working tonight making sure all those silly people who actually want to shop tonight will have carts and a clean store to play in. True I get off at 11pm but what can you do when all that's left to do is go back home and wait for the new year to jump you in the darkness? I'm not even gonna bother looking at a bar. I don't want to venture into one of those without at least a couple friends and my one attempt at spirits wasn't a great success. I could try and rouse my only remaining friend in the neighborhood, Washu, but I doubt she'd want to do anything. She's not been the most social as of late which I can understand due to holiday work hours. So what to do then? Make some more headway on my fanfics? I'm sure my fans would like that. Read? Done too much of that lately. Play a new years practical joke on someone? Again not without friends or someone good to prank. Maybe i'll go digging under my bed and find something I could sort or toy with. Oh well. Happy New Year to all of you. May this next year bring you what you most need, be it joy, peace, or whatever. Cheers!

Merry Christmas and stuff...

A little christmas cheer from me to you. This is my theme song this christmas. Its a new little dity by the Goo Goo Dolls entitled Better Days. I would suggest giving it a listen. Its exceptional.

.

And you ask me what I want this year

And I try to make this kind and clear

Just a chance that maybe we'll find better days

Cuz I don't need boxes wrapped in strings

And desire and love and empty things

Just a chance that maybe we'll find better days

.

So take these words

And sing out loud

Cuz everyone is forgiven now

Cuz tonight's the night the world begins again

.

And it's someplace simple where we could live

And something only you can give

And thats faith and trust and peace while we're alive

And the one poor child that saved this world

And there's 10 million more who probably could

If we all just stopped and said a prayer for them

.

So take these words

And sing out loud

Cuz everyone is forgiven now

Cuz tonight's the night the world begins again

.

I wish everyone was loved tonight

And somehow stop this endless fight

Just a chance that maybe we'll find better days

.

So take these words

And sing out loud

Cuz everyone is forgiven now

Cuz tonight's the night the world begins again

Cuz tonight's the night the world begins again

Lost Innocence Resounding...

For some reason I woke up this morning with a desire to skim through my unsorted picture box. It quickly became a trip down memory lane. I basically ended up ignoring anything post Hawaii. Picking through my years there I kept coming up with pictures that jumped out at me. Pictures that had vivid memories attached to them, almost like watching a movie. And with each of them I kept remembering how I felt I was on top of the world, I felt like I was at my ultimate there, like I was as smart or as big or as happy as i'd ever be at that particular moment. I can't help but marvel at my utter innocence and child like faith in myself and my world. In particular I keep coming back to the idea that I knew i'd be living in Hawaii the rest of my life. It was all I remembered, all that i'd ever known and really cared for. It was my home and my love. It didn't matter if some other place was bigger or had more cool stuff, it could never replace Hawaii. And in a way thats still true. Hawaii is the golden paradise of my childhood and no matter how many times I go back there now and see it for what it really is, a crowded tourist trap, it will never wipe out my childhood love of the islands, but it will seperate me. And that pains me becuase now I know i'll never be able to enjoy it like I could back then. The love is still there but reality has risen up and built a wall around that love made of the harsh stuff that reality is. I've become jaded, of maybe its just enlightened. Whatever it is it has shut me off from regaining my lost golden paradise. And while i'm perfectly content with my life and home as it is I can't help but wonder what it would be like to have the golden paradise back again. If I had never moved would I still feel the same? I doubt it. It's questions like these that keep me coming back to my pictures. Questions like these that make me treasure that special time all the more.

Battlescars...

Rawr! Just got back from my Tai Kwon Do final. The only person this quarter to test for and pass for two belts. I'm now officially a Cho Rok Dee(green belt) of the Choi Tai Kwon Do school of Martial arts.

Honestly I was scared to death. Passing for green belt requires quite a few things. You have to know both the yellow and green belt poomse(forms/kata) which, if you don't know what forms are, are a series of moves designed to simulate taking on various attacks from every direction. They're my favorite part of the sport and I was totally ready for them. To test for each belt you must learn at least one new one as well as be able to repeat all your old ones. Higher belts often learn two or three new poomse to advance.

Also, each level comes with certain one step defensive moves that you must learn. Each is designed to respond to a basic punch or kick from your opponent. For instance; A3, one of the 9 you must know to pass to yellow belt, delivers a knife hand block to the opponents punching wrist while at the same time delivering a knife hand to their throats. Green belts add on 5 more one steps including two that require you to actually drop your opponent to the floor before delivering the final blow. Also a very fun part of the class.

Then of course there's your knowledge of the basic foot and hand attacks as well as all the blocks and stances required for the next belt. Fairly basic stuff. After that comes full contact sparring with two opponents of your level. You fight for 2 minutes using every kick, punch, or block you know of and are graded on your technique, not how many hits you land. Sparring is my weakest area honestly. I'm naturally more prone to defensive measures which means TKD isn't really my thing. It would suit me much more to take Aikido or Hapkido as those center on blocking or redirecting your opponents attacks. But thanks to two quarters of class i've become more bold and much more confidant in my offensive abilities.

Next comes a test on your vocabulary, which is all in korean. Difficult but not overly so. After hearing the teacher's instructions day after day in korean it gets well ingrained in your system. Unless you're not paying attention in class like alot of the white belts were. Many had a very difficult time answering correctly. Some were so far off the mark they were told to go sit down and wait to come back up and try again.

And finally there was breaking. This was the part I was scared about. For green belt and up you are required to break pine boards. Guys are required to break 3 and girls 2. Again as you move upwards your number of boards increases. This was the first time i'd broken boards and frankly it was easier then i'd imagined. It did take me a couple tries to break the board with my knife hand, its still hurting now, but my front kick and step side kick went through after only two tries each! Thats pretty good for someone completely new to breaking like I was.

I didn't come away without injuries though. I got a nasty 5 inch friction burn on my left arm during sparring from blocking a kick but with the fluids pumping like they were I didn't notice till nearly five minutes after the fact. I also knocked my left leg muscle pretty hard when I roundhouse kicked my opponent and he blocked. Gonna be walkin funny for a couple days. Then of course my right hand hurts because of the repeated attempts to break my first board.

But despite all that I came away with a B in the class and my 2 new belts. I'm so happy! I'm even thinking about taking another term of this. I must be crazy.